What is truth? What is absolute truth? What is absolute moral truth? For a number of months now, this has been the most searched question that has shown up in my blog stats. This is encouraging to me to see there are still people who really want to know what truth is. While I've written here before about absolute truth (click here to read), I feel I should write more specifically what it is. This is of course, all going to come straight from the only Source of truth, Jesus Christ, so you would need to believe in Him if you really want to know what truth is.
As with any issue of debate in the Church, good Christian people are quick to quote this Scripture and that, depending on the matter being discussed. This is exactly the problem in understanding absolute truth. The Bible is massive and you can find one verse that solidifies your belief, while another believer can find another that solidifies his own. If you read the Gospels of Jesus Christ, you learn this is the very reason He came. He came to expose the absolute truth of God's Word. He tells us that Himself. So, while the entire Bible is there for us to learn from, it is Jesus' own words that clarifies it all. All. Everything. Every question there is, it is Jesus' own words that tell us exactly what the truthful answer is, but there is one requirement to understanding: You must really want to know. You must really want to hear the truth from Him only, because if you do, He will reveal it. If not, there will still only be confusion.
So, a good question to start with especially because it has been so highly publicized lately, specifically with a 10 year old in my area being killed from his father beating him ... is it Biblical to spank children? This is a subject matter believers in Jesus Christ dispute and debate over, instead of simply going to Him; instead of simply asking, "Jesus, would you spank a child in order to discipline him?"
Where and how did you learn spanking or corporal punishment is Biblical? From the "spare the rod" verse? Or others? Was it what was done to you? Was it preached from the pulpit? Or did it come directly from Jesus Christ's own words? If you have read Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, can you find any words or verses anywhere where Jesus says this is how to discipline and train a child?
In Matthew 5, Jesus clearly speaks about anger and how anger is judged no differently than one who murders. All sin is sin. Then in Matthew 18, Jesus clearly speaks about the consequences of those who cause any child to sin. Is a husband or wife allowed to hit each other if one sins and is it helpful to the marriage? In Matthew 26, how did Jesus respond when Peter drew his sword and cut off a man's ear? The question is, is slapping, striking, smacking or spanking a child the method Jesus would use if He were training up a child to go in the way he should go? If we are to "do unto others as you would have them do unto you," do we want children slapping us back ... or slapping other children? If Jesus had wanted us to hit children, wouldn't he have hit the woman at the well because she was committing adultery ... which is wrong? Children are little people who are learning how to treat people of all ages.
I spanked because it was what was done to me by my mother who had it done to her. Once I learned that Jesus will clearly tell us every single thing we need to know about everything ... by His Words and by what He did to those who sinned against Him ... I realized I was wrong. It is impossible for you to tell a child he cannot hit another person, if you are the one hitting him. Don't do as I do??? Try this on for size: "Son, this spanking is to teach you not to lie, cheat, steal or sin in any way, but you must understand you can never do the same to anyone who sins against you. If someone sins against you, you must love and forgive them, but you cannot hit them for any reason. I find nothing in the Words of Jesus to confirm my actions towards you because He never hit a single person, but I want you to believe in Jesus Christ and love Him and obey Him with your whole heart, soul and mind."
As I've been reading The Child's Story Bible by Catherine Vos to my grandkids this past year, I've never understood more than I understand now, just how far the Church has drifted from teaching us how to learn from Jesus Himself. As we sit on the couch with this "child's" Bible that by today's standards would be considered an adult Bible (because we do not require as much from children or ourselves today), I look back and can clearly see how different I would have parented my children.
When you consider Deut. 6 carefully, does this describe your parenting currently or how you parented previously ... or how you were parented as a child? When you stop and seriously consider how much time in a day you spend "impressing these commands upon your children or grandchildren when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up," if you are honest with yourself, how much time do you really spend reading AND discussing God's Word to your children in comparison with all the time spent doing everything else you do?
When my children were young, we spent more time in the mini-van than we did at home. By the time they were in school all day (before I took them out to be taught at home), went to whatever practice was in season, went to all their games, went to birthday parties, friends' homes to play, vacations and all the church activities that were offered for them as well as their parents ... there was no time for me to read Deut. 6, let alone obey it. I was guilty of disobeying Deut. 6 and I understand today, had I understood the urgency of those words, there would not have been the need to spank. We would have been spending so much time in the Word that we would not have had time or desire to do everything the world and church offered us to keep us away from home. Sending them to Sunday School, and praying at the dinner table and after a quick devotion at bedtime does NOT at all even begin to resemble Deut. 6.
What I know for sure today is that sitting with my grandkids and training them in the Word (specifically The Child's Story Bible) leaves very, very little time for games, crafts and making cookies. What is does leave time for is conversation, conversation, conversation ... conversation they cannot get enough of. It is in that conversation where we discuss everything under the sun, even spanking ... as we did last week after my grandson heard about the little boy who died from his beatings and wondered why anyone would do that to a child. I told him when we raise children the way Jesus teaches us to raise them, we never hit anyone for any reason.
Call it a swat, a pinch, a slap, a smack ... call it whatever you want, Jesus didn't do it and He never told us to do it either. He told us we will give a child bread or stones. Bread (which is Him) feeds and nourishes, stones (which is NOT Him) bruise and destroys. I am a product of what happens when spanking destroys and I will never be one to say it was good for me because it wasn't. It only confirmed how inadequate, insecure, incompetent and unworthy I was. It deepened the anger in me and taught me to hate and took decades to deal with. And because I've learned how to learn from Jesus Himself, I've completely forgiven my mother because she only knew what she knew to do at the time.
If you ask people for their opinion on spanking, that is what you'll get. If you ask Jesus Himself, you will get nothing but the truth. Try it: "Jesus, am I honoring You and Your truth when I hit my child? Will he learn who YOU are by my actions?"
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